Friday, August 24, 2012

An Open Love Letter to Prince Harry


Dear Prince Harry,

I feel like this is partially my fault. I should have warned you about Vegas. I'm a respectable member of society and there are only three pictures of me in Vegas my publicist will allow me to post. All were taken at breakfast.

Love, Me

P.S. You are now officially my only crush in any of the reigning monarchies. Call me, maybe.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

U.S. Olympic Skeet Surfin' Team

Dear International Olympic Committee and Esteemed Members of the Athletic Community: 

If Ping Pong and Curling are Olympic caliber events then I respectfully submit my suggestion for the next best event. That that event is Skeet Surfin'. The East Germans won't stand a chance. 

Why? Because it's totally bitchin', Ridin waves and blasting pigeons. And its neat shootin' skeet when you're ridin' on the heavies all day.


I Wish They All Could Be Double Barrel Girls

I will have no problem fielding a U.S. Dream Team and finding sponsors. Currently thinking that Becker  and Winchester are the natural providers for team apparel and equipment. 

I will be expecting your call.

Sincerely, 

Susan E. Geissler
Captain, Olympic Hopeful, Cheese Eater
U.S. Skeet Surfin' Team

I Don't Drink My Coffee, I Chew It

Some days you wake up early feeling inspired, ready to tackle any challenge that comes before you, knowing that nothing, NOTHING! can stand between you and the best. day. ever. 


...Then there are mornings when you take your freshly ground coffee and dump it directly into the top of the coffee pot forgetting that the filter is still on the counter, hit brew, and don't realize it until you take a big long drink and it appears you have been chewing potting soil. I win at life.